Ben Amarfio has opened up about some of his most traumatic and difficult experiences as a black man, in a courageous bid to stamp out racism.
Speaking out to The Herald Sun on behalf of 12 other Kangaroos, the North Melbourne CEO recalled moments when he was subjected to horrendous prejudice and abuse throughout his life.
As a teenager in the Essendon District Football League he was targeted by two elderly spectators who said, “Go back to the jungle you f---ing dirty n----r. That’s where you belong.”
“After years of abuse, even I was surprised by that. When you’re a kid, you just don’t expect to cop it from grandmothers as well,” he said, voice trembling from having to relive the moment.
Sadly, Amarfio says he has hundreds of similar stories, just like that one as the son of a Ghanaian father and Armenian mother.
“Back in those days the hygiene wasn’t what it is today -- and you’d pass the cordial bottle around during the breaks and everyone would take a swig from it … ” Amarfio recalled in tears.
“And then, I’d swig from the bottle and the next kid wouldn’t want to touch it … stuff like that happened all the time.
“When I reflect, s---, it’s been tough sometimes.”
That was when he was young, but he’s still subjected to racism to this day.
“I was walking down a major high street one day and a mother had her two young children on either side of her,” he said.
“I was walking towards her -- and I was dressed smartly, so there were no cues for her to be alarmed -- and she hurriedly clutched her children and pulled them under her arm, away from me.
“They look at you, they look you up and down and literally pull their children out of your way and visibly take a sidestep.
“And I’m sure other black people have experienced the same.
“I was getting a sandwich one day at a cafe in the Docklands. The server would place people’s change into their outstretched cupped hands. I would put my hand out to accept my change, but instead of placing the change into my cupped hand, they put the change on the counter and pushed the money towards me and stepped back.
“Mate, that’s the sort of stuff that still happens.
“I know my experiences aren’t unique. I feel for the many others who have had it far worse than me.”
The Kangaroos are making a strong stance in the wake of the latest racial attack on Carlton’s Eddie Betts and the atrocities occurring in Australia and all over the world to people with black skin.
“Football and footballers can play such a crucial role here because of the standing the game has in our community,” Amarfio added.
“If people can see that this is what their role models are doing and saying, then maybe they will think there is some substance to it and something they should be taking notice of.
“And for me, racism and prejudice stems largely from ignorance, fear and familiarity. That’s the root of it and so you’ve got to deal with the root of it.
“We’ve got to break down the ignorance and fear and encourage familiarity.
“That’s how we’ll change it.”
Amarfio and the 12 players have penned the following statement:
North Melbourne is a diverse club. Many faiths and many cultures. White, brown and black brothers and sisters all cohabitating in an inner-city club that is our home away from home.
But sometimes, and it only needs to happen once, when we step outside of our footy clubs, homes or venture online, we are exposed to the harsh reality of prejudice and racism.
As young boys and girls, black kids are often told: “Don’t worry, we are all one. We are all the same. We are all brothers and sisters.” But once you experience that not everyone has the same understanding, it hits you, like a punch to the gut.
We are proud of our heritage. Our work mates are from all corners of the world and our players are white, Indigenous Australian, African, Fijian, Maori and Papuan. We’ve all heard the poisonous nicknames which get thrown around by the ignorant few.
Sometimes it's overt. More often than not it's subtle or casual. Regardless, the effects are long lasting, compound over time and cut just as deep.
We often ask, why is this? Why do some wish to label and divide?
For those who still seek to see differences instead of commonality, we remind them that our blood is red, just like yours. Our brains are composed of neurons, just like yours. Our hearts beat the same as yours do. We have hopes and dreams, just like you. We also have feelings and we are hurt when you treat us as something lesser simply because of our heritage, or the color of our skin. All we ask is that you judge us by our character and behaviour, instead of our color, and that you kneel with us, not on us.
- Ben Amarfio, Jed Anderson, Jy Simpkin, Aiden Bonar, Matt McGuiness, Majak Daw, Tarryn Thomas, Marley Williams, Aaron Hall, Paul Ahern, Kyron Hayden, Kaitlyn Ashmore and Mia King